23 July 2011

Hotter Than Helios

I was planning on a very timely, very well researched post on the dangers of heat exposure. Unfortunately, in light of the 109 degrees the thermometer was reading outside and the absence of air conditioning in my lovely old fixer upper, I went to the movies instead. It was my first movie in an acutal theater since August Rush came out a million years ago, so I was pretty excited for the cinematic experience itself in addition to the climate control.

As an aside, this Harry Potter is totally not appropriate for small children, but I enjoyed it.

So it's hot outside, and not just here as the weathermen and my friends on Facebook tell me. Heat related injuries in children range anywhere from heat rash or mild dehydration to the more severe heat stroke, which can be life threatening. Staying out of direct sunlight is certainly helpful, as is liberal application of sunscreen for those children who will find themselves exposed to the sun. Serious sunburns bring with them additional fluid losses through the skin, so if your child looks vaguely lobster-like please make sure they are drinking.

In fact, everyone should be drinking. They should be drinking lots, because often they won't feel much like eating. I would say this is not such a bad thing, since who wants to cook when it's this hot out? But if your child's appetite drops off a bit, be all the more vigilant about fluids.

What sort of fluids, you might ask? Why the messiest ones around are usually the best since, let's be honest, anyone who has not gone through puberty is probably running around naked right now and everyone else (myself included) is probably in a swimsuit and can be hosed down.


So embrace the sweets, at least until the weather cools. Then schedule an appointment with your dentist to apologize and brush and floss diligently to make up for your transgressions.

In the meantime, stay cool. In addition to the usual water activities, might I suggest the following as well:
  1. Stand in front of the open freezer door until someone yells at you to shut it
  2. Go to the nearest restaurant that offers free refills and stay there until they close
  3. Visit Costco (or equivalent) and hide several lawn chairs in the garden shed display then snack on their food samples all day long
  4. Make friends with someone who has air conditioning
  5. Acutally physically BE someone who has air conditioning, call me, and I will certainly be friends with you
And for my husband, one very specific suggestion: STOP TELLING ME ABOUT HOW COLD YOUR OFFICE IS OR I AM GOING TO HAVE TO HURT YOU!

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